Dating

Some people suck at dating.  Maybe they have that whole, nervous mumbling thing that's all awkward and 'romantic comedy'.  Maybe they come off as cold so no one asks them out thinking they don't have a chance.

Some of us just hate dating altogether.

Not just the 'act of' dating, but the whole idea of it.  It's total crap.  Dating puts expectations on you before you even know if you like the person.

This dating business is too over-thought.  Too stressful.  There are Rules to dating.  Like kissing on the 1st date and if a guy calls on Tuesday then the girl makes herself unavailable till Thursday to keep him in suspense.  Really?  So if a guy wins spontaneous tickets to your OMG Favorite Band Ever! and the concert is tomorrow night, you're supposed to say 'No' because you don't want to look too available?

Which is worse, being 'available' at a rockin concert or being 'unavailable' sitting at home watching Say Yes To The Dress while you down a bag of Doritos?  Sodium increases cellulite, btw.

Way to go ladies, you passed up a badass evening because you read that a CosmoGirl is never too available.  Now you're Would Be hot date is at the concert. . . with someone who was available. 

So dating has all these rules that pretty much fuck everything up.  Instead of doing what you want to do, you're doing what you think you're supposed to do.  And why date someone if you're not comfortable enough to do what you want?

Don't forget about expectations.  The whole reason you're with this person at the movies/coffee shop/whatever is because you both have a 'Goal' in mind.  That you're going to, what, be boyfriend and girlfriend in a couple of months?  And if that doesn't happen you can't be friends anymore because this ridiculous little concept didn't pan out like the magazines say and your little hopes are dashed?  Lame.

What happens if the dates go well but then once you see them interact with other humans you're mortified?  You have to break them down gently now, because you've already started dating which means this person has told all their friends and parents about you and they've probably been imagining some kind of future together.  Yikes.  You didn't realize they were such an idiot until you saw them in their natural element and you've already made this vocal commitment with the word 'Dating' that now you've got to chew your leg off nicely to get out of it.

Dating is flawed.

Save the term for someone you are actually excited about seeing and already know you're into.  Date the guy that has already proved that he is beyond 2dimensional on more than one occasion.  Date the girl who always manages to surprise you with her coolness.  Don't date the cute chick in the shoe department with the nametag that says Jyll.

If you want to get to know the mall girl, invite her and her friends to a group event.  You can both get to know each other in a no pressure, expectation free environment.  And if you don't bone, you can still probably be friends at the end of the day.  Unless she's a total flop, then drop her ass.

It's not like you two were dating. . .